Cue the late Aretha Franklin’s hit song “Respect”.
I recently did find out what it means to me. Especially, when it comes to respecting myself.
I’ve mentioned before on this blog and on Instagram as well that I am someone who loves resolutions. I set myself resolutions for both every new year and for my birthday. This year for my birthday, I had made a couple of resolutions for myself and, I’m proud to report, I have been seeing them through. Since its been a couple of months now, I feel comfortable discussing the impact they have made in my life and hopefully inspire you to also set some goals in respecting yourself too.
These resolutions are simple but were incredibly effective and got me the desired result – and I truly do believe that therein lies the recipe to success in making resolutions. People (myself included) typically make these grand resolutions and ultimately set themselves up for failure – and then they do just that. They fail and then are hesitant to make resolutions for themselves ever again.
Setting a simple resolution may seem like it won’t do much good at first, but let this post show you just how wrong that is. It sounds simple enough, I want to respect myself more, but the steps I took in doing so made me look better, feel better and yes, increase my self-respect.
Only wearing bras that fit.
I’ve been vocal on this blog before about my struggles with accepting my chest size. The whole of 2018 is a test for me to experiment and ultimately decide at the end whether I want to go through with getting a breast reduction. I decided that before I took such a drastic step, that I would try to embrace my breasts and see if at the end of the year I still wanted to go under the knife.
One step in embracing my breasts that has made a massive (excuse the pun) difference is actually wearing the right size bra. This is difficult for me to admit but I’ve been wearing bras that are 3-4 SIZES TOO SMALL. I’m almost embarrassed to admit to how dumb this was but wearing a bra with a C on it, it truly made me feel a whole lot better. I took the drastic step of chucking all of my too small bras into the garbage and found that I was only left with 3 bras that actually fit (don’t even get me started on sports bras). So now, I am forced to buy all new bras and this time, they WILL fit.
Here’s an article by the Huffington Post that explains that 80% of women are wearing the wrong size bra and how you can finally find your perfect fit. The article itself was a perfect fit for me as the author and I had nearly identical experiences (we literally had the same wrong size and ended up with the same correct size, what are the chances?!)
I found that it was futile for me to complain about shoulder pain and side spillage when I was really self- sabotaging and not accepting my “breast-friends”. Now that I’ve tackled this problem, my confidence has greatly improved. Finding proper fitting undergarments seems like a minor or maybe even obvious thing to do but I had been putting it off for months and months. Finally, I took a stand in the name of self-respect.
Weekly blow outs.
Long hair is hard to manage – and my extremely thick and wavy hair is even harder to manage. But I don’t want to just “manage” my hair any more – I want to wear my hair like a crown. So, I made a promise with myself: if I were to go back to having long hair, I would ensure that it is always healthy and always looks its best. To make good on my promise, I have been getting weekly blow outs. This has been life- changing. My hair is now shiny, it bounces when I walk, it has movement and god damn it, makes me feel like a Kardashian. Is there really anything better?
Those were the two simple changes I made to my life and they’ve helped make 23 a more confident year for me. By making these small changes — by respecting myself in making the decision to leave my hair to the pros, I got to have the best hair of my life and by simply starting to wear the right size bra, I not only look better, my shoulders can have a break and my posture has greatly improved.
What goals/resolutions can you set in your life, as small as they may be, that might help you in respecting yourself? What do you need to do in order to achieve these goals?